Grow up as a girl you may have had some pretty conclusive ideas what it meant to become a woman. You swore you’d never replace a soccer ball with a make up kit, and you haven’t. You decided that you’re the kind of woman that goes to the game instead of the salon. That’s great. We all need the freedom to become the person we believe we are. Every now and then we can offer ourselves a little more by embracing the idea that we can have the best of both worlds.

It might start with a simple anti aging wrinkle cream at the first sign of crows’ feet and laugh lines. From there, you might find that waxing the car is easily followed by a visit to a massage therapist. While you might not be ready for skin peeling treatments or chemical enhancements, you can find that spending a little time on you isn’t so bad.

Many of us just don’t place ourselves in the position to spend time on us. We pack our schedules very tightly and we make sure that the kids get everything they need. A significant other may or may not be ultimately helpful, and is often even more work. Then there are things like pets, cleaning the house, and cooking.

When do we fit into that schedule? How many evenings do you have that you can freely leave the house and go get a little special time treatment? If you can’t go because of the schedule then it is time that you look at rearranging the schedule.

Single women with children are going to have to get more creative than women in long term relationships. Often you’re going to have to find ways to rotate family members as babysitters or find a little evening time to devote to you after the kids are in bed. Your need for energizing through self tenderness is inarguable as you are stretched even tighter than other women.

We don’t have to define tenderness or even being pampered as the same thing. It’s not a bad concept like some were raised to believe. In fact, whether you think a thirty minute hot bath is wonderful or you’re looking for a full facial and the works from the spa, your definition is your own. And whatever that definition is works just fine.

You simply become better at all of your jobs when you remember to care for you. Parenting to partnering to work creates demands on you that can be draining. Taking a little time to fill yourself back up is paramount to family and personal health.

Tags